Dogs Take Trip to Hog Heaven

A Trip to Hog Heaven?
By Bob Epling
The Campus Game

Arkansas should beat Georgia this Saturday.

Felt that way at the end of last season after the Razorbacks lost more close ones than Alydar.

Felt that way all summer after Head Hog Bobby Petrino beat the over-under and stayed on the job more than fifteen months.

Felt that way at the end of fall camp when pundits from Kirk Herbstreit to Mark May jumped on the Razorback bandwagon in this game faster than gamblers used to flock to Hot Springs.

Felt that way at the start of this week after Georgia opened the season 1-1 playing less defense than Taylor Swift showed against Kanye-on-cognac.

Arkansas features big Ryan Mallett and little Michael Smith. Georgia counters with sore-shouldered Joe Cox and Trinton Sturdivant on crutches.

Bobby P, former NFL head coach and noted offensive guru, calls plays for Arkansas. Mike Bobo calls plays for Georgia. His dad was a pretty good high school coach in Thomasville.

The Hogs whipped Missouri State in a glorified scrimmage to open the season, then took a week off to prepare for the biggest game of Petrino’s SEC career (and probably to let their players knock off a few community service sentences). They come into the game rested, healthy, and with something to prove.

The Dogs got collared by Oklahoma State in Stillwater to kickoff 2009, then survived the annual blood-letting border battle with South Carolina, but I figure they still made time to go to church (twice a week), walk a few old ladies across the street, and maybe build a couple Habitat for Humanity homes. They limp into the contest tired, battered, hoping only to survive.

Arkansas should beat Georgia this Saturday.

Still, Georgia against Arkansas?

Georgia. The Peach State. Home of Atlanta, capital of the new South. Home of beautiful mountains, beautiful beaches, and beautiful women. Home of Herschel and Hammerin’ Hank and Hedges that Bulldogs roam between.

Against Arkansas?

Arkansas. The Natural State (what, do they not wear deodorant?). Home of Wal-Mart, Tyson Chicken, and one of college football’s great old monuments. But enough about Frank Broyles. Some might argue Arkansas is a lot like Alabama – except without the national championships.

Thank goodness the internet hasn’t reached the Ozark Mountains yet or a few hillbillies might get mad if somebody read them this article.

By the way, I can say what I want about hillbillies because I have some hillbilly blood in me (only mine is the noble West Virginia-coal miner type hillbilly, not the tainted, Billy Bob Thornton-as-Carl in Slingblade, Arkansas-variety).

Georgia lose to Arkansas?

Does Daisy Mae lose to Ma Kettle in a beauty contest? Does Snuffy Smith lose to a jug of moonshine? Does Nashville lose to Branson?

Arkansas should beat Georgia this Saturday.

Arkansas beat Georgia?

“Boooooooooh …. Pig! Phooie.”

And, why don’t you Razorbacks get a more dignified chant like “Gooooooooo – Dogs! Sic’em! Woof, Woof, Woof, Woof.”

Professor’s Pick: GEORGIA

(Hello to Frank, Anjulie, and all in Arkansas … you know I’m teasing, but the phone’s off the hook if Dogs lose : ).


Check back tomorrow for Professor’s Picks and Around the SEC

Thursday Night Game

Georgia Tech at Miami: The Yellow Jackets ran all over Miami in 2008, rushing for 472 yards in a 41-23 rout against a Canes defense that looked like it’d never seen the option. With extra prep time from a weekend off, the U should be better prepared, but I’m riding the Ramblin Wreck until it crashes.
Professor’s Pick: GEORGIA TECH

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